New Diet Fad!

In a conversation with friends over the weekend about how frustrating it is that beer, etc., causes weight gain, I have come up with a new idea.

That's right, it's Dr. Kim's Vodkalimia Diet! Here's how it works:

The Vodkalimia Diet is intended only for those with short-term weight-loss goals. The premise of the diet is to drink as much vodka as possible, thereby forcing the contents of your stomach to be ejected (in scientific terms: chowdering). Those with long-term goals or who are extremely obese should not participate in the Vodkalimia plan because 1.) it takes longer for heavy people to get drunk, which means more vodka for you and less for other participants, and 2.) the longer the diet, the greater the chance the enamel will corrode off your teeth. Sure, you'll be thin, but you'll also have meth mouth. Might as well cut out the middle man and go straight to the meth. (Do not pass Go, do not collect $200. You'll need it for the meth. Note: Dr. Kim does not endorse meth diets of any kind. These statements have not been approved by the FDA.)

This originated as the Beerlimia diet, but it was determined that participants would not want to smell like beer all day. It was thereby changed to vodka, because it is odorless. However, should you decide to create your own Beerlimia diet, please send me your $85 fee to avoid copyright infringement. Failure to do so will result in the complete removal of your beer. And driver's license.

Please note that you should not drive while on the Vodkalimia Diet. Your judgment will be severely impaired. Similarly, do not hang out near brothels.

Enjoy! Think of how beautiful you will be! Try not to barf on yourself!

(For those of you who think I'm being serious...lighten up. And have a vodka.)