Fustercluck II

Originally posted Dec. 2, 2005

Surprise, this one's actually not about work.

See, this is why I hate the whole health-insurance, medical system. It's ridiculous! Check out what I've been going through this week.

OK, so I went to my doctor in Walnut Creek on Oct. 20 for a routine physical, at which time they noticed that the glands in my neck (just above the voicebox) were swollen. The lady seemed surprised when I said I hadn't noticed, and that they didn't hurt. She asked me tons of questions, then ordered some normal tests, which included blood, cholesterol and thyroid panels.

Fine, so two weeks later, I went to Pleasanton to get the tests done. I'll admit that since my doctor's appointment, I had been thinking a lot about my swollen glands and what might be the cause, especially because the lady seemed surprised when I said they didn't hurt or feel tender. I looked it up on the Internet, and there are a variety of things that swollen, nontender glands are a symptom of, including several different types of lymphomas. That's a bit freaky, to say the least.

A few days after that, I called my doctor's office for the results. They said everything looked fine, and that even my thyroid was fine (which was a surprise, considering I have such a hard time losing weight). So that was comforting... but I noticed that my glands were still swollen.

So I've been monitoring them. They're squishy and not hard, so that's a good sign, I guess, and they're able to be moved around. They haven't grown. But goshdarnit if I haven't been tired every single frickin' day for the past few weeks. Every morning, I wake up and it feels like I haven't slept at all. It's the most frustrating thing. And I've been getting 8 hours of sleep a night, so it's not like I'm skimping.

Finally, tired of being...well...tired, I went back to the doctor on Wednesday. I was out on my lunch break and I called them to say my glands still hadn't gone down and that I was tired every day. My doctor said to come in. So off I went, to Walnut Creek again, and got checked out. She said nothing looked abnormal on my blood test, but I explained what was going on, and although she said she's not worried about it, she prescribed me to get an ultrasound on my neck to check for any malignancies.

Unfortunately, she recommended I go to Pacific Imaging's Walnut Creek office. Back at work, I tried to call to schedule an appointment, but I was on hold until 5 p.m., when they closed, and then I got booted to a voicemail system. I left a message saying to call me back the next day so I can schedule a date. I had also called the San Leandro office to find out if I can go there, since it's closer, but played the hold game all over again.

The next day (yesterday), nothing. No calls from anyone. So I call San Leandro again. Finally I get someone, but they tell me they don't do those kinds of ultrasounds there. They recommended I call Pleasanton. But before subjecting myself to bad Kenny G music and 3 hours of staying on hold again, I decided to just call Walnut Creek and find out straight from the source which office I could go to that would be closer than Walnut frickin' Creek.

Hallelujah, I get a live person at the WC office. She says that yes, indeed, I can go to Pleasanton. I'm reluctant to get off the phone with her at this point because I've spent half of the past two days on hold with various offices, and it felt so good to talk to a live person. Finally I call Pleasanton and get through to someone, and (yes!!) she starts taking my name, birthdate, SSN, and insurance information. But as soon as I say my Blue Cross provider is John Muir, she tells me they don't accept John Muir, and that I'll have to call my doctor's office and have them re-refer me to someplace that does.

Completely frustrated, I call the doctor's office and tell them what's up. They put me on hold and finally tell me they're going to have me go to the outpatient medical imaging department at John Muir Hospital (why didn't they just do this to begin with? The hospital is across the street from them!). The dude says he's filling out my order and will have it waiting at the front desk.

I call John Muir imaging and try to schedule an appointment, but after the usual rigmarole, the lady says she can't schedule anything without the order, and that I'll have to call the doctor back and either have them fax it to her, or pick it up myself and bring it to her. Also, the first date she has available is Jan. 22. WHAT?! What if someone's dying? They have to wait 2 months for an appointment, and in the meantime run around trying to get someplace that accepts their insurance?? This is craziness. Just this whole run-around alone is enough to kill someone.

So I call the doctor's office AGAIN, and they say they're faxing it "right now." I let a few minutes pass, then I call John Muir again. The lady puts me on hold FOREVER, and comes back to say they didn't get it yet. It's 5:20, and they're closing in 10 minutes, and there's NO WAY I'm getting off the phone again, because I'll just have to call back and sit through "your estimated wait time is 4 minutes" for an hour all over again and IF THEY DON'T DO SOMETHING NOW, I'M GOING TO HAVE A HEART ATTACK!!! I tell her to go check again, because the doctor's office said they were faxing it 10 minutes ago, and that I want to schedule my appointment today.

At 5:31, she comes back on and says the order has just arrived. And she can put me in on Dec. 21. Finally! Progress!! The end of madness!!!

I'm thinking that now, they might as well test my blood pressure while they're at it. I'm sure that's a few points higher as well. So here's a big middle finger to HMOs. You suck.

Mrs. Duhamel commented: I am so sorry that you are having to go through this! But finally someone finally understands what I go through and the story of my life! Got to love Blue Cross!!!